My definition of complacency fog is: The kind of fog where you feel settled and comfortable where you are and with what you are doing.
Don’t get me wrong – sometimes this is not a fog. Sometimes this is a great thing!
BUT. And here’s the B.U.T. Ask yourself a question: Are you really happy? It can be hard to tell… Here’s a few guidelines that I have been known to use:
- Do I feel happy – or do I feel comfortable? These are not always the same thing
- Do I feel challenged? To me, where there is no challenge, there is no real happiness
- Do I think about where I am and what I’m doing when I’m not doing it? To me, if something does not creep into my conscious uninvited, at least every now and then, it means that I am comfortable and not happy
I’ve learned a lesson lately – complacency, to me, is arguably my least favourite place to be.
Complacency is defined as: “self-satisfaction especially when accompanied by unawareness of actual dangers or deficiencies”.
AHA! See – it even says it’s a dangerous place/way to be!
I am at my happiest when I am uncomfortable, even if only slightly; it means I’m growing, learning, and evolving into a better me.
I have also discovered that it’s very easy to become complacent, especially when things have been tough for long periods of time. You feel like enough is enough! Stop the world, you want to get off! Give you a break! You are tired. You just want to be for awhile; just rest.
Trust me, I know. I’ve felt that myself, time and time again. And it’s definitely OK to do just that – give yourself a break. But give yourself a deadline with that break. Write it down somewhere, so that it’s not harassing you on a regular basis. But make sure you have it.
Don’t give yourself permission to give up, give in, or take a seat in the back row for the duration. You owe yourself more than that! You owe it to yourself to ask the question:
Am I happy? Or am I complacent – and it has lulled me into a false sense of happiness?
If you are happy – all is well. Congratulations! Enjoy the feeling. We don’t always need to be growing, stretching, and evolving. It’s exhausting! And we all deserve time to savour our successes and be comfortable in our own skin.
But if you are complacent – if you are settled for the sake of being settled or comfortable in the name of avoiding a challenge – ask yourself if that is really where you want to be. If it is – don’t sell yourself short; re-asses and maybe you’ll see that you are actually happy and should allow yourself to be just so.
But if you are not, you may be in a complacency fog. And it’s not a place I recommend.
I’ve been there. I’d bet we all have.
When auto-pilot is on for 90% of our day. When everything is easy and our attitude becomes more laissez-faire (let it be; let them do it) and less laissez-moi le faire (let ME do it)!!
Step back. Clear the fog. What are you missing?
Give yourself time and space, and see what the new horizon brings.
You might be surprised what you find.