The Harperness Project – A Year in Review

Well, then. Here we sit – another year over. As I look back over my blogs for the past year, I realize that my Harperness Project is now ‘technically’ over, and it’s time to review. It’s been an interesting journey. I’ve covered subjects along the way including health, attitude, perspective, acceptance, energy boosting, marriage, balance, easy outs, home, celebration, and focus. I had many successes both great and small, and I’d have to say, about the same amount of failures.

Some of my failures are easy to explain away and cover with life got too busy excuses. Some are simply me admitting that I found areas in which I am lacking, and realized that a month simply won’t do it to turn my ship around – I need to keep working at some of life’s larger challenges (for me, this includes things like health, perspective, and easy outs).

My successes came in all shapes and sizes. Some months were huge wins for me; and looking back, they are easy to identify because I remember those months clearly and I can even remember how I felt for much of those months. Some successes were smaller or more camouflaged – for example, just the fact that I did this project for 12 months solid to me, is a success. There were times along the way when I thought that I was too far off track, or I’d missed too much of a month to bother, or any number of other reasons why I wanted to stop. But I didn’t. I finished. So, yay me.

I also learned a lot about myself. I learned about where I need to keep working on my Harperness Project; in particular, where I need to keep growing as a person. I also learned what things I’m quite good at – and these things will be things I can fall back on when times get tough and I feel like I’ve lost myself somewhere along this crazy ride of life.

A big thank you goes out to those of you who came along with me on my journey, and to those of you who undertook a similar journey of your own. I hope you’ve identified and faced your challenges, taken some time to enjoy your successes, and I hope that you have also learned that you, too, have more good about you than you think.

Here’s to whatever 2014 will bring, for all of us. Happy New Year, everyone.

Cheers!

Read Full Post »

For Better – Not For Worse

As many of you know, I am a big fan of author Gretchen Rubin. I have read her books and even followed her approach by doing my own Harperness Project in 2013. I also follow her on Twitter – and quite recently, she posted a wonderful quote:

Secret of Adulthood: Make sure that things you do to make yourself feel BETTER don’t really make you feel WORSE.

This statement truly gave me pause, and quite literally food for thought as I get ready to begin a new year. I have been asked quite a bit over the last few days, by several people, what my New Year’s Resolutions will be for 2014, and my answer so far was “nothing, because they don’t work and I won’t do them…”. But maybe, just maybe, I need to make a single resolution following the quote I posted above.

I am a fairly emotional person, by nature. While this is a part of my charm, as it means I often wear my heart on my sleeve, it also means that I have a tendency to get the mean reds. And when I do, I turn to bad food – junk food. In my mind, I know that it won’t help me feel better or solve whatever problem I might be facing. But no matter – in the moment, it’s what I’ve convinced myself will make me feel better. And by the end of the night, I often do feel worse.

So…

• How do I break the cycle? 
• How do I stop this from happening? 
• How do I stop myself from doing things to make myself feel better and end up feeling worse?

I need to learn different ways of coping; like doing yoga, or having a warm cup of tea. I can hug my cat, or sit down with a warm blanket and a favorite book. I can listen to a favorite piece of music, or have a run while watching a clever sitcom. I know that all of these things will make me feel better – and will actually make me feel better in the long run. 

So here is my New Year’s Resolution for 2014: I will m

I will print this mantra off, and put it up in my usual ‘glance’ spots – places where I tend to go, or to look, when the mean reds start to set in. And I’ll keep my eye out for self-sabotage.

In 2014, I’ll ask myself: What am I really doing? And I’ll make sure it’s always for better, and not for worse.

Read Full Post »